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Every year I try to go to Nuit Blanche and …

every year the following thoughts come through my mind …

  • It’s too fucking cold. It’s like playing cricket in the West Indies … you can have a 1000 yr drought, play a one day international cricket match and the heavens will open. This entire week was warm, but the night of Nuit Blanche is always fucking cold!!
  • I’m not going to complain like any year before …. like 2009
  • Drunk people make me laugh. In any mass gathering of people, there will be tons of people drinking, some puking (maybe some mass puking), but people will be drinking. If you’re gonna complain about drunkeness, then Nuit Blanche is not for you.
  • I’m never interested in seeing any type of Art during the year, but for some reason I’m compelled to want to see the shitshows on the streets, the random performances, “social sculptures”, “interactive random art” – knowing that I won’t get it, or I will think it’s complete and utter shit. However, could there be a lesson for the real art and cultural institutions to reach audiences the other 364 days of the year?
  • As an IT consultant – the Scotiabank app reeks of dogshit. Who’s testing this fucking app? The last three years, they spent a shitload of money to design a navigation app for the event and EVERY year it crashes and/or doesn’t work. Yet again in 2011, the app didn’t work … Scotiabank and your developers completely suck at testing … why would I want to use your bank, when you can’t adequately stress test a fracking GPS app? Business blunder at it’s best … here’s another take on last year’s app fail!
  • I’m trying hard not to complain, since Nuit Blanche is a noble attempt to get people out and about, but why couldn’t it be earlier in the year … hell even two weeks earlier – to avoid the cold temperatures?
  • Why even bother with an online guide or using the app to have descriptions of the “Art”? Then again, try explaining anything in 100 words or less … it will take me 100 words or more to describe my last bowel movement .. yet these guys have to explain a year of work in 100 words or less.If I did have to describe it, I would use phrases like “A melodious syncopation of water and peristalsis coupled with an overwhelming interactive olfactory experience”. This shit blows.”
  • I had to sign a waiver at one of the exhibits … because I might get wet and sue … seriously!

  • I feel bad for artists, since people will show up late or at the end of the night, while they have to move a half-ton of equipment across an acre of broken concrete by himself as none of his volunteers showed up for the final shift, since the volunteers had to run home and complain that Nuit Blanche sucks – on the big screen!
  • The lineups are too long and I want to destroy people … since I’m better than them … never mind that are thinking exactly the same thing
  • Why not give awesome artists more of the money and make the thing awesome? Why subsidize shitty artists? Check out the rants on Yelp … I think we all collectively suck these days!
  • I could never do or see all this crap. Truth be told, you can’t really even do a tiny portion of it, unless you’ve mastered the ability to teleport and freeze time and space – where is Doctor Who when I need him with that fucking TARDIS?

About Rishiray

Rishi Sankar is a Cloud HRMS Project Manager/ Solution Architect. Over the past 15+ years, he has managed to combine his overwhelming wanderlust with a desire to stay employed, resulting in continuing stints with 3 major consulting firms (IBM, Deloitte, Accenture). He documents his adventures around the world on "Ah Trini Travelogue" with pictures and stories from the road/tuk-tuk/camel/rickshaw. You can follow him on Twitter at @rishiray and on Facebook at "Ah Trini Travelogue . He doesn't like Chicken Curry but loves Curry Chicken and is always trying to find the perfect Trinidadian roti on the road. He also doesn't like cheese and kittens ... and definitely not together. E-mail from his blog is appreciated like a 35 yr old Balvenie at [email protected]

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