So where are you now? I’m in my 30’s and looking for balance …

Jan 28th, 2011

So I’m a teenager

• In my teen’s I was dreaming. Who isn’t a dreamer in their teens? Every existential and emotional crisis seems like the end of the world. Funny that someone who has no idea of the world, can imagine the actual end of their personal world … someone would say a bit ironic?
• I longed to explore but didn’t have the experience, tools or means by which to do so. Every place felt so far away, watching the places and lives on TV made me feel like a passenger in my own life – I longed to be like the explorers and knowledge hounds I saw on TV. It seemed so far away.

So I just finished university and grad school – early 20’s

• I’m going to get a job. The best job. The greatest job. I know everything that I read in a book is true, makes sense and will allow me to make those dreams from a couple years ago into a reality.
• I’ve spent the best years of my life in school absorbing all sorts of useful knowledge so that I can impress everyone with my intelligence, so that I may be accepted in some form of society that is respectable.
• My first paycheck is going into the bank and I’m going to save diligently, so I can make those visions of Creme Brulee on the Champs Elysee a reality. Cliff jumping from a waterfall … pfftt … so passe … that’s my average Thursday.
• I travel to a couple places and really impress MYSELF. Like really … I’m infatuated with the idea of seeing the entire world in a couple years.
• I gain enough knowledge to know that it is going to be struggle unless I will the lottery.
• I realize that I won’t cure cancer, break a world record or write something of such significance that I will live on forever in the minds of others.

So I quit my first real job and I’m going to continue traveling the world – Mid 20’s

• I have a bit of money in the bank but I realize that the job I had is holding me back, so it’s time to quit. Work is for plebs. Realizing my dreams is what I need to be in the business of doing.
• Keeping high balances in the bank is utterly useless, since money is meant to be spent.
• Experiences can’t be bought and time is short.
• Time to get rid of a lot of stuff. Stuff holds you back from your dreams. You can’t see the world if you have tons of stuff – whether in your apartment/house, backpack or in your mind.
• I wan’t to be the best traveller ever. I want to have the best experiences and tell the best stories. I want to be admired for this. Seriously.
• I realize that baggage in the form of relationships is not a “value add” to this lifestyle, so I will have people in and around me but not too close lest I get attached and have to spend time in a place or regret someone making me stay.
• I keep learning.
• Funny thing though … I started forgetting the dreams I had when I was a teenager. They somehow got replaced by new dreams, especially since this world travelling thing was actually working out.
• What to do when your dreams are being replaced … well obviously have new dreams … right?

So I quit my second real job , I’m still travelling – Late 20’s

• I’m racking up experiences by the boatload. I also have a lot of souvenirs – shot glasses, paintings, and pictures. Like a lot!
• Want to know what happens when you move but you have a lot of souvenirs? You toss them all in the trash or you keep them in boxes. All those experiences and keep sakes … in boxes. Ironical?
• I get tired easily. I’m picky since I’ve eaten Pad Thai in Thailand, Sushi in Japan, Curry in India .. so I can give useless pretentious opinions and frown on the opinions of others. As though my opinion was better than theirs. Silly!
• I realize that I like great scotch, good eating and gadgets. I love my gadgets. Someone told me that you need money to have those things … strange … I’m so interesting and worldly … why can’t someone see my awesomeness.
• I continue the hard pace of traveling – my bank account of course, never grows significantly. You can’t buy experiences … you also can’t buy a house or save for other things. Pick one or the other .. or do you?
• Additionally, I have the sense now to know that realizing that you should have known something before is only good, if you actual use the lesson

Now I’m in my early 30’s

• I like coming home, yet I yearn to be on the road all the time. Not really, the road but I want my long trips like I used to have.
• I also want turkey soup, a nice espresso and watching TV under my blankets.
• I don’t dream about travelling on the road anymore, since I can travel any time I want.
• I structured my life to enable my dreams, but once you’ve achieved those dreams … I’ll need new dreams.
• I know that I don’t care to be the best traveller ever, since it is an impossible task and will make me sad – a Promethean challenge of sorts.
• I also need to update my reasons for travel … things have changed
• I’m also grateful that I’ve been able to shape things in the way I have … and I’ve been so lucky that I was allowed to have that freedom.

(March 2013) I’m officially in my mid 30’s

• I like coming home a lot more now
• I’m also getting married this year(!) … don’t believe it … here’s the wedding website.
• I’m actually dreaming about having that fat RRSP/401K, and working towards it. Damn the cliche!

(October 2013) I’m officially in my mid 30’s

• I’m married and I bought a “cottage” … more cliches!
• So some new balance is coming!

So in the next couple years … I’m no longer dreaming of faraway places, adventures to be had or taking that perfect picture … I need to chase something I haven’t had until now … Balance.